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Topic: Handfasting  (Read 1848 times)
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« on: January 12, 2006 12:44:49 PM »

I have been married for five years and I have decded that my family know that I am wiccan. i want celebrate this by having a handfasting cerimony. I want to celbrate my marriage by geting married in my own religion. I need a little help from my fellow wiccans. I don't know how to tell my 80 year old grandmother that I no longer practice my family religion(southern baptist), nor do i really know how to tell my husband extremely catholith family. I have practiced paganism for about 8 years now, and I am not ashamed of it, i just don't want to hurt,or upset anyone. How can I renew my wedding vows in my religion and celebrate this with my family.

« Reply #1 on: January 15, 2006 12:01:27 PM »

I have the same issues with trying to please everyone, well "had" should be the appropriate word. My fiance's mother (who is really religious) made me realize that I was stressing for abosolutely nothing ^_^ she simply said "Its your day, do what you will be happy with, no matter what it is I will come to celebrate no matter what" and thats really what family is about right?
In the invitations mae sure you specify that this ceremony will be a handfasting, so no one shows up and gets angry that they traveled or spent money on somthing that they dont believe in. You could also say that if they dont want to come to the actual ceremony they could attend the reception (so they can still celebrate but not go against their belifs) Also, when writing your ceremony you could try to tone it down a bit (or atleast explain what is going on in the program to the non-wiccans). Also, if you are worried about negative energies, just have the guests sit outside the circle. Its drawn for a reason right?
Hope this helps.
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« Reply #2 on: February 07, 2006 10:32:29 AM »

I have been thinking about how I could incorporate bits of Handfasting in with our wedding, which will not be religiously focused at all, so that we will know, but  not necessarily will the guests (many of them anyway) understand. So, any other ideas would be greatly appreciated.

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« Reply #3 on: February 21, 2006 07:09:19 PM »

I am pagan, if anything at the moment. And while I decided not to have an overly religious ceremony and a very quick one at that I did consider some of the traditions that surround handfasting. As I've seen and been told, the officiant ties a knot (loosely) around the couple's joined hands and after the ceremony it hangs over the door. The bride and groom can choose to jump over a broom (It's supposed to be the leap you take for love and the broom represents both the male and female ends of all living things) You could read your vows in gaelic (that way nobody would understand, or have to understand if they didnt want to). At the moment that's all I can remember. Some alternatives to having angry guests is the people you're worried about offending, tell ahead of time and let them know that this is important to you. reception ideas could be a maypole or traditional foods, I have a whole cook book of recipes and their meanings as well as some recipes for honeymeade if you want them and i'll be happy to pass them along.

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