A Crafts Community For Craft Ideas & DIY Projects - Craftster.org
Help | About | Contact | Press | Advertise | Cookie Policy | Terms | Site Map
Welcome, Guest.
Please login or register.
Random Tip: Curious if a project is for sale, or if someone wants to do a private swap with you?  Please Personal Message the member rather than posting on the thread.
Total Members: 303,162
Currently Running With Scissors:
549 Guests and 16 Users
Home Craftster Community Crafting Articles Craft Tutorials My Craftster Crafting Calendar City Guides Craft Shop

Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 14
Jump to page:
  Show Images Only     Send this topic  |  Print  |  Bookmark  
Topic: X-RATED CROCHET....Danger Phallus's ahead...{Now with pattern} Ornament Added!  (Read 108236 times)
Tags for this thread: tutorial , mature_content  Add new tag
Share the love... Pin it Submit to reddit add to Wists
« on: July 24, 2004 06:45:41 PM »

Ok Here goes:

Tilted up:

Top View:

Bottom of "shaft"...the pouch tie off area:
to change your image viewing settings please click here

This was originally intended to be a "sculpture" but I turned it into a pouch last minute...
sorry to picture you all to death but I wanted to capture all its very ....um ....essence!

Lets just say that I had a lot of free time!! Wink
Hope you enjoy!

P.S...I hope that no one was offended in the viewing of my latest!
Sincerely ~M

« Last Edit: November 12, 2010 11:16:34 AM by jungrrl - Reason: changed non-working images to links. » THIS ROCKS   Logged

~*D.I.Y or BUST!*~

« Reply #1 on: July 24, 2004 08:22:30 PM »


So - would begging get you to post the pattern?
Friend of Craftster Friend of Craftster

Offline Offline

Posts: 1104
Joined: 07-Jul-2004

my arms are too short to box with God.

View Profile WWW available for personal swaps
« Reply #2 on: July 24, 2004 08:28:08 PM »

that is so hilarious.  now i want matching penis and vagina coin purses.
« Reply #3 on: July 24, 2004 09:48:02 PM »

That could also be a vibrator cozy! Yes, please give us a pattern!! That would make great dirty Santa gifts.

"Be to her virtues kind, Be to her flaws a little blind"
shes crafty
« Reply #4 on: July 25, 2004 08:31:44 AM »

Isn't it missing some "twins"? Grin So dirty we are!!!
It doesn't feel like exercise when you're wearing chiffon.
Offline Offline

Posts: 764
Joined: 18-Jun-2004

Forget Stitch n Bitch. Nurse n Knit!

View Profile WWW
« Reply #5 on: July 25, 2004 09:14:20 AM »

OMG thats hysterical! I love the vibrator cozy idea, also wouldnt it be cool to make that, and an extra large vulva coin purse to store it in? LOL

visit www.freetostitchfreetobitch.org
my blogs can be found at livejournal (cheekymama) and blogspot (cheekymamaof2)
« Reply #6 on: July 30, 2004 06:59:26 PM »

My my my, You Crocheters are sooo nasty. We knitters are so prudish...lol
« Reply #7 on: July 30, 2004 07:47:49 PM »

Hello fellow crafters!

Here is the pattern:
starts at base...
-ch 18, join w sl st
-ch 1, sc in ea st for 18 rows
-1 sc in next *skip 1, sc in next 2* (6 x's) {this is to decrease for 1 row before head shaping}
-2 sc in ea st around {starting to increase}
-1 sl st, *1 sc in next, 2 sc in next*
-1 sl st, 1 sc in next, *skip 1, 2sc in next* skip last st (12 x's) {on the decrease again}
-1 sl st, 1 sc *skip 1, 2 sc in next* (6 x's)
-1 sl st, 1 sc *skip 1, 2 sc in next* (5 x's) skip last st
-1sl st in every other st to close

[[the 4 rows that begin with 1 sl st ea seemed to make the crease under the head appear for me]]

now back to the base to add on the drawstring and holes (this step can be omitted if you dont want a pouch/cozy)...
-join yarn next to where started at the beginning continuing in the same direction ch 4, skip 2 sts, *dc in next st, skip 2, dc in next st* all the way around, sl st into 1st "hole"

now for the fuzz...
-join 2 strands of fun fur held together, ch 1, sc in ea st around, sl st to finish, sew in ends

for tie string...
-ch 1 strand of fun fur and 1 strand of matching yarn (i did brown and brown but you can pick any color you'd like)  ch about 40
-weave the chain in and out of holes crocheted in at the end

I used a little stuffing and pushed it up into the head so it would keep its shape too
I wrote the pattern up as I went along so I hope that It works for anyone willing to give it a whirl

Enjoy!   ~M

« Last Edit: August 30, 2004 02:26:55 PM by Laamissa » THIS ROCKS   Logged

~*D.I.Y or BUST!*~

« Reply #8 on: July 30, 2004 08:58:13 PM »

Sheer genius!!!!

Thanks for the pattern. Everyone I know will be getting crocheted phalli for the winter holiday. Thanks for reminding me to have fun while crafting, sometimes I get so serious about it.

I don't know about the vibrator cozy though...  all of my friends' vibrators have curved thingys and extra "love-button" stimulating appartuses. That would have to be a custom job.  Wink
Friend of Craftster Friend of Craftster

Offline Offline

Posts: 4643
Joined: 23-Jan-2004

I eat seakittens.

View Profile WWW available for personal swaps
« Reply #9 on: August 21, 2004 10:44:41 AM »

I can't help myself.  This craft is too cool.  Now you need to make a detachable foreskin.

As for the good work, as amie said, I hope you don't have any trouble keeping it up...  Wink

Find craft patterns, supplies and humor at Lothruin.com!

Find me on Ravelry as Lothruin!
Threads you might like:
Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 14 Jump to page:
  Send this topic  |  Print  |  Bookmark  
Jump to:  

only results with images
include swap threads
advanced search

your ad could be here!

How-To Videos
How to Make Patriotic Flag Pins
How to Make Crazy Crayons
How to Decorate Bags with Apples
How to Make a Personalized Fish-Themed Invitation
How to Make a Forest Diorama
Latest Blog Articles
@Home This Weekend: Quilted Patchwork Basket
Craftster Quickies: How to Make Spooky Halloween Decorations
Craft Challenge #110 Announced - Halloween Costume Contest!

Comparison Shopping

Support Craftster
Become a
Friend of Craftster

Buy Craftster Swag
Buy Craft Supplies
Comparison Shopping

Craftster heartily thanks the following peeps...

Follow Craftster...

Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.11 | SMF © 2006-2009, Simple Machines LLC
SimplePortal 2.3.5 © 2008-2012, SimplePortal
Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!

Copyright ©2003-2015, Craftster.org an Internet Brands company.