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Topic: Holiday Handmade gift disappointment :(  (Read 57984 times)
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MandyLikesPie
« Reply #390 on: November 12, 2008 09:51:48 AM »

I make quilts, and sadly they to are sometimes under-appreciated.

If someone underappreciates a quilt, they should be forced to sit and watch someone make a quilt. Seeing how precise and time-consuming it is might make them a little more grateful.  Cheesy
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Muria
« Reply #391 on: November 12, 2008 10:22:35 AM »

I firmly believe that time consuming gifts should be arranged in advance, preferrably with some participation on the part of the one receiving the gift (they need to see what goes into it, and what a labor of love such a present really is). To knit something on small needles, or quilt something takes an incredible amount of time, and the receiver ought to know exactly what goes into it. I know it spoils the surprise aspect of it, but it's worse to put your heart into making something extraordinary and have it be treated like nothing.
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Muria

Where did all this fabric come from? I CAN'T have bought THAT much!
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« Reply #392 on: November 12, 2008 10:34:46 AM »

This is only sort of related, but I say, if people aren't going to appreciate your effort, maybe give to someone that will. I know there are lots of great and deserving organizations in the 'crafting for good and not evil' forum. I know that crafting gifts is partly showing your love of someone, but also to feel more motivation/purpose for your crafting. Maybe making a small blanket for an elderly person with no family for the holidays or a homeless pet would fulfill the latter for you and provide a warm feeling (literally and figuratively) for someone else for the former.

Not saying you should feel obligated to craft for charity, just something that popped into mind that might make some of you feel a little cheered up from the disappointment you have felt in the past. Smiley
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o0IrishEyes0o
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« Reply #393 on: November 12, 2008 01:01:52 PM »

I make quilts, and sadly they to are sometimes under-appreciated.

Oy!  I made a quilt for my mother for Mothers day about 5 years ago.  I spent like... $90 and countless hours couped up in my college dorm room with my sewing machine.

Not only did she not seem appreciative of it... I've never seen it since.  It's not even laying around the house somewhere.  It sucks.

It was the first... and only time... I've ever quilted.  The whole experience turned me off of it completely Sad
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« Reply #394 on: November 12, 2008 02:26:00 PM »

I can't pull myself away from this thread cause I feel so awful for everyone who goes unappreciated after all the time, money and skill they put into an item. While I feel lucky cause I've never had this happen to me I want to give you all a big hug! and who knows, maybe it'll happen this year-first time I'm giving gifts to my Bf's family. I know a few of them will be into it, but the men folk...

*hugs everyone*

*dances your sorrows away*
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« Reply #395 on: November 12, 2008 02:29:55 PM »

For guys I sometimes cut my losses and get them gift cards.  It's SO HARD to make for men you don't know well... and most of them are picky with hats or mittens and the like.  Gah.
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« Reply #396 on: November 12, 2008 02:51:16 PM »

Yea, my brothers, dad and bf are easy, but BF's two brothers? Um yea. One is 28 and the other is 18. I think I'll probably make each a rice bag to microwave since the 28 yo lost five toes in august and he's going to be in a wheelchair for a long time, so being warm is good when he is out in it. And the 18 yo likes to be cozy. Yup. And cookies. Fail safe. Whoot! Still crossing my fingers though. Fortunately they're the kind of family that if I see them not using the rice bags I can say "What, you're not using the f*$%in' rice bag? Asshole..." and they'll just laugh and be like "ok ok, sheesh."

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« Reply #397 on: November 16, 2008 01:05:45 PM »

thankfully my family have always been fab with homemade gifts and they have said they actually prefere them i am homemaking all my gifts this year and have prewarned friends that this is the case and they are also really excited about it

i have unfortunatly come across some disappointment from my exes family with homemade gifts and they werent even really ones from myself they came from my daughter (obviously she had some help like assembling magnets sticking pics to calenders etc) and we never got 1 thank you from them so now we dont waste our time for them from her they now just get a card with a up to date photo in cos i refuse to craft for people who are downright rude over it
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ica171
« Reply #398 on: November 18, 2008 12:08:46 AM »

I posted last year that I was worried about making something for my niece because my sister was so anti-homemade.  Well, basically what happened was I made her knitting stuff--needle roll, yarn bag, and a few sets of handmade needles from dowels.  It was exactly what she wanted.  Due to the ensuing fit from her mother, we no longer draw names for gifts.  That's right, I singlehandedly ruined Christmas.  Roll Eyes  I'm not too worried about it, since almost everyone is getting handmade gifts from me this year, too.  If I'm giving you a gift, you'll get what I want to get you. 

IMO it's really really rude to sneer at a handmade gift, just like it's rude to sneer at any storebought gift you receive that isn't exactly what you wanted, and people should be grateful they're getting a gift.  Most people who would politely say "thank you" to a package of white tube socks have no problem griping to your face in front of everyone about a handmade gift.  Why?  What makes this acceptable behavior?  I honestly think that some people see a handmade gift and think "cheap."  Not hardly.  Not only do supplies sometimes cost close to what you'd pay retail, a lot of time usually goes into handmade stuff.  It's not unusual for me to put forty hours into a project start to finish, because I design most everything I make.  Even if you use a pattern you're looking at some serious time.  If you figure $10 an hour for your time, you'll put a hundred or so dollars in through labor easy, counting shopping, cutting, mistakes, etc. 

I once made my niece (a different one than above) this beautiful floral dress with a matching coat.  Both were gorgeous--the coat is what I describe as a "Madeline" coat, from the book--it was hot pink and had a Peter Pan collar with a high waist.  The dress had a high waist and a super gathered skirt with little puff sleeves.  It was so cute, and I did an awesome job.  Seriously, it was some of my best work to date, and I'm not the only one who thought so.  Her mother did not even try them on her.  I have never seen her wearing them, and I don't doubt that they were given to Goodwill or tossed into the trash at the first opportunity.  I guess that's the risk you take making something for someone--your hard work could go into the garbage as soon as you're out of sight. 



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Muria
« Reply #399 on: November 18, 2008 03:39:47 AM »

So the niece you made the coat and dress for: is it the same mother? Or do you have two in the family?
Due to the ensuing fit from her mother, we no longer draw names for gifts.  That's right, I singlehandedly ruined Christmas.  Roll Eyes 

Seems to me, the mother is the one that singlehandedly ruined Christmas, especially if her daughter actually liked and wanted what you made.

Then again, you're giving crafting stuff. She hates crafted stuff. You're spreading the disease of wanting to *gasp* MAKE STUFF. If this keeps up, the mother might be the next one to get an awful (because it's crafted), time consuming, handmade gift.  No, no! That just won't do!  No wonder she's upset. You're  a crafting proselytizer!  Cheesy

(Ok, I admit, I'm impressed that I spelled "proselytizer" correctly, in part because it still looks wrong. Smiley  )
« Last Edit: November 18, 2008 03:40:38 AM by Muria » THIS ROCKS   Logged

Muria

Where did all this fabric come from? I CAN'T have bought THAT much!
ALL the boards craftalong: 11/40
Beginning wister
Will personal swap for coins from 1944
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