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Topic: how do you let a muggle down nicely when they ask you to knit something?  (Read 115145 times)
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celestya22
« Reply #850 on: June 01, 2010 03:27:13 PM »

I'm a long time lurker on these forums, but I've finally created an account because I just had to say thank you to the OP. This thread is fantastic! I've read every single post over the last week (while knitting!  Cheesy). There is a lot of great advice here, which I shall make good use of!

I too have had issues with people demanding gifts, and with non-appreciation of gifts once they get them. Luckily they've been few and far between.
My worst experience was actually with painting (I dabble in acrylics, mostly landscapes. I'm not great but it's a good outlet). My aunt received a paint by numbers as a gift (because it had a cardinal on it and she loves and collects cardinals). She asked me to do it for her because she wasn't good at painting and I was. Umm. Nice backhanded compliment....I offered to paint her an original painting of a cardinal. She said 'oh that would be great! When do you think you'll be done them both?'. . . .
Unfortunately my mother was on board with her so I ended up doing the stupid thing...but I still haven't bothered with an original. What's the point if she considers it of equal value to one a 10 year old could do.  Roll Eyes
« Last Edit: June 01, 2010 03:29:04 PM by celestya22 » THIS ROCKS   Logged

FluffyMonkey
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« Reply #851 on: January 26, 2011 11:52:16 AM »

I have a 'craft nest' - a basket that I use to store handmade items recently made until I use them. For example, I might really want to make a certain amigurumi but not want to necessarily keep it or display it with my other ones, or I might make a hat or something that just really doesn't suit me (sadly) after I have finished it. Then, at Christmas, I pull these out and gift wrap some of them. I know it sounds like I haven't thought of the recipient, but I won't give it away unless I know the person will like it, and it suits them etc. Sometimes I purposefully fill the 'craft nest'. Anyway my point is, it allows me to give things to people with enough space between making the item and giving it away that my hopes aren't high about seeing them wear the item, or even appreciate it the way I would like. Sometimes they are cherished, and this is a good feeling!

Brilliant on the craft nest. I have a dresser for all of my knitting things (though it has over-flowed more than a little) and one drawer has some baby items I've knitted to use up stash yarn or because I was bored. Very very helpful when random friends are having babies. Around mid to late twenties, that starts happening WAY too much for me to have time to sit down and make a sweater for each person's kid on demand. They always seem to have baby showers when my hours pick up at work (or I feel more like reading or gaming than knitting).
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Demi_Kitten
« Reply #852 on: January 31, 2011 04:12:07 AM »

After reading all the pages of this discussion I am shocked but at the same time unsurprised by how rude people can be. I outright say no because people just don't understand the length of time it takes to create something and then they never want to make it worth my while. I once did a gift swap with a girl from college, I was going to knit her a scarf and she was going to get something of equal value. I spent hours on the scarf and got a 4 box of chocolates in return. I smiled and thanked her and I've never done anything like that again.


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mandyandbingley
« Reply #853 on: March 03, 2011 08:31:25 AM »

I haven't been knitting long enough to be asked to knit something for someone... however I've been doing photography as a hobby for a long time, and at my nieces baseball games, so many parents want to start treating me like the hired help asking me to take pictures of their kid, too. They don't want to buy the pictures, though, I guess they think because I'm not the hired photographer, and taking pictures of my family for free... their pictures are free, too, right? lol. They ask me if my camera is digital... yes it is, so I'm not wasting film, but if you want sports pictures, YOU go spend $2,000 on a camera body, $1,600 on a telephoto lens, and then learn how to use it all, and then you too can take your kids pictures "for free" Wink

And, these aren't even people I know at all asking me to do this, I don't have any problem telling them no, that I'm just taking pictures of my niece. People that I know, I have no problem quoting them a price, or like I did recently, doing a newborn photo shoot as a baby gift for some friends.

It's not as time consuming as knitting, but it's (ridiculously) expensive getting the equipment, and the editing process can be time consuming... that's why the people who get into it as a business can (and do) charge so much, and it's sooo rude that people think they can just ask for a free service... photography, knitting, crocheting, sewing, anything. Rude rude rude, lol.
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« Reply #854 on: March 03, 2011 10:46:14 PM »

I think this kind of thing expands to cover all crafts. If you don't do it, you just can't know.

I just finished 4 years of art school training as a silversmith, and holy snapping arseholes. People kept (Still do, actually) asking me for high level work with a Claire's style pricetag. (My favourite? I had a necklace a woman wanted to buy, I quoted her $100, a VERY reasonable price. Her response "Pfft. Yeah right! I can buy a pair of designer jeans for that.") Wal Mart and other places like that have kind of conditioned people to expect bargains everywhere.

I was also asked to do alot of repair work for little to no money. It's like if you're a student or a hobbyist your time isn't actually seen as worth anything.
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« Reply #855 on: March 05, 2011 12:06:38 PM »

Other than "No" or, if you have the time and want to promote the craft, "No, but I'd be happy to teach you to do it yourself", I recommend responding with this selfish seamstress haiku--blunt, but the truth.  Just replace the word "sew" with "knit".
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« Reply #856 on: March 05, 2011 06:48:55 PM »

Thanks for the link WoB. I love her outlook on what is a skill she took time and spent money to learn.

I quit making things for people unless I have a lot of say-so over the final project.
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Kitsune-Tearz
« Reply #857 on: March 18, 2011 10:02:42 PM »

Just finished reading this, and I was just about born with appreciation of crafting... my mom knitted and crocheted (and she did so very well and quite fast) and my Grandma Quilts (and does some amazing ones, she makes them as everyones wedding gift... she starts when they get engaged, has them tell her what colors they like and such, and styles they like.... she did this with me and my fiancee like... a week after we got engaged lol)

and i treasure everything they have both made me, my moms even more so now that she is gone. she was insanely fast... she'd pump out a crocheted afghan in 2 or 2.5 days (depending on how much time she could put in, in one day) and a knitted one in less then a week... i envied her speed... i'm a slow crocheter, and a *really* slow knitter but i am slowly getting faster now...

I mostly do other crafts, my favorite being dreamcatchers. thats where most of my horror stories are.
I made a beaded dream catcher (fully beaded, i wrapped the ring in wire that i had slid lots of sead beads on to, and the webbing was string, again completely beaded)
and on the one, i used a swarovski pendant in the middle that my mom had given me.

the other day in class, i showed someone a picture of it because they asked about it when i was telling my friend about it. she looked at me and said "Its so beautiful!", followed quickly by "Will you make me one? blue, with a center thing like that? I'll pay you!" and i said, "how much do you think its worth?" and she said "well what, it'd probably take what $10 for supplies? and take an hour or 2?" and i looked at her and kind of gawked... i couldn't help it... the dreamcatcher was just about $50 in beads alone, plus the ring, the wire, the string, the feathers, and the fact that the pendant i had, was discontinued for years, and a similar sized one, would be $50+ dollars.... and when i explained that to her she thought i had to be lying to her because i didn't want her to have one... and got really rude. then i told her about the fact that it took 12 hours, and that was with good beads, the one with cheaper beads took 2 hours longer due to having to remove and re-bead at points because of wonky beads....

so this does happen in tons of crafts but... i'm lucky it doesn't happen to often, and the one who does request stuff the most, is my ex-gf's (we are still really close, like sisters...) mom... she is really nice about it... usually its she shows me something and asks "Do you think you could make this or show me how to make it?" (she knows sometimes if the project really interests me i'd happily make it, but if not, if i can figure it out, i'll show her) and she never gives deadlines, or if she does they are *really* long... (like, in jan one year she asked if i could make her something by december, or any time in between... it was a little craft and only took me an hour or two) and ALWAYS pays for the supplies and lets me keep the extra, and then pays me for my time some on top of that, she's so appreciative, and so happy when i give her the stuff, that she is a joy to craft for... and when i decide to surprise her with something i actually have to make her promise not to try to pay me back for it before i give it to her or she will try to pay me!

she is really sweet and wonderful, and she generally makes up for all the jerks i do get, and my fiancee is wonderful and loves my crafty stuff, never askes me to make him things, but is absolutely over the moon when i do Smiley so i gues i'm on the lucky side Smiley
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« Reply #858 on: March 20, 2011 02:34:51 AM »

I would just say "knitting is not only time consuming, but very expensive. There's no way I could do it for $10. BUT, how about I make it your Xmas gift?"

Or something like that. I'm pretty blunt, and usually point out that by the time I've told them how much everything will be, they probably won't want me to do it anyway. I usually tell them to imagine how much it'll cost, then triple it. Even then they sometimes don't come close! People presume it's cheap when it's really not.
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mandyandbingley
« Reply #859 on: November 16, 2011 01:23:26 PM »

I remember reading this thread around the time I was just starting to knit a few months ago, and thinking "wow, people would actually ask you to make them stuff?" because I have just never been the type to ask people to make me anything.

OMG... do they ask you! Now that I am knitting like crazy... making gloves, trying new patterns and stitches... people won't stop asking me "Oh, I love that, could you make me one?". My latest request was to make a huge ugly blanket, being told "you'll have all winter to do it" like that's all I want to do. Knit a big ugly complicated blanket. With the blanket request I just kinda brushed it off like the person was joking... though I knew they weren't. The other requests I let them know I'm just knitting for myself, and that since it's so new to me, I have a lot I want to try out for myself. I don't make a lot of money, so I don't buy myself many new things (plus I do hate clothes shopping, but LOVE browsing patterns, go figure!), so I love how with knitting, if I want I can buy some cheap Lion Brand yarn with a 50% off coupon and have a cute hat for a couple dollars, or some gloves, all of which I haven't bought myself for a few years now, so my "selfish list" (though it's not selfish at all to only want to knit for yourself) is getting quite long, lol. I don't see myself wanting to knit for anyone else, besides close family, for a long time, lol.
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