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Topic: Pride and Prejudice - Or, Why Don't They Like Stuff We MADE?  (Read 10589 times)
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christa71701
« Reply #60 on: October 06, 2006 07:02:42 AM »

I don't know, I would say it has to do with how they were brought up also. There's some people who just aren't happy about anything really. I have to say I have a relative who's sooo picky I don't get her anything because there's always a complaint about it. I plan on giving handmade gifts for the first time this year and I look forward to the time I'm going to take to make them. I plan on emboridered hand towels for my adult family. I have no clue about my niece's and nephew but I'll figure it out. I would be discouraged though, like someone else said, the flowers may be so well loved she puts them on her vanity in her room so that they don't get torn up or the scarf put in the drawer. They my look at them everyday and think how lovely she made this for me. My husband is a good example, he was in the military and got to go overseas and bought me this beautiful handmade leather vest. It has the pieces of leather sewn together and it's pretty delicate. I've had it for 5 years and haven't worn it a day but it's in my closet and everytime I see it I remember the excitement and love in his eyes when he gave it to me.
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dancingrabbit
« Reply #61 on: October 07, 2006 11:58:41 PM »

When my son was born, my mom made him a gorgeous bib with his name on it.  Before he started solids, he never needed a bib.  After, I was afraid to use it if whatever he was eating would stain it.  Which is basically.. anything.  So he has hardly worn it.  But every time I see it I think about the effort she put into it.  And if it were all stained and icky by now, I'd feel bad.

On the other hand, my MIL made Jaxom a quilt, and we have used it like crazy, but the difference is that using it won't ruin it, so I'm not afraid to.  I definitely appreciated the time and effort put into both gifts though.

I bet a lot of handcrafted items are like my bib - put away for "nice" instead of everyday use.  At least in my home they are.
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jloveg
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« Reply #62 on: October 08, 2006 07:39:52 AM »

dancing rabbit that  was a  good idea to keepsake it  rather than  ruin  his  wife some day (hopefully)  would enjoy recieving it.   I had  one  similar crochet mittens and  matching booties..... My daughter  HATED  the  mittens and booties on her   altho I  loved them  SO I put them  on a stuffed  bear that  was  right beside her crib witha  picture of the person would  made them  in the bears  arms..... not  packed  away for her when seh is old enough to take good care  of them...... so  yes  those sentimental  about  gifts  its  understand able..... most the time you know the difference.
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looking for instant coffee from australia or russia made with mustard and champagne.  VIOLET CRUMBLES and VEGEMITE would be welcome swap items!!
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« Reply #63 on: October 09, 2006 07:24:13 AM »

I was reading this advice column today on Yahoo! and Dear Margo has an interesting letter posted that seems relevant to our conversation:



DEAR MARGO: My niece had always loved dolls as a little girl. I adore my niece, and a few years ago, when she was 8 or 9, I gave her two handmade dolls for her birthday.

I put a lot of time, energy, money and love into those dolls. A few weeks ago, her mother called to tell me they were having a garage sale, and that "Marilyn" had outgrown the dolls and they were going in the sale. My S-I-L (my niece's mother) thought I might want the dolls back.

Although I was a little (OK, a lot) hurt that my niece didn't value the dolls enough to keep them, I was, nevertheless, grateful that I was given the opportunity to get them back instead of having them sold to strangers.

However, when I went to pick up the dolls, I was told that since they'd easily bring $20 apiece in the garage sale, I should pay fair market value. (I paid at least $100 just for materials, but that isn't the point.)

I forked over the $40 to get the dolls back, but I can't get over this resentment. Please help me make sense of this. I don't like this feeling I'm left with.

                       - RAGGEDY AUNT

DEAR RAG: Two words come to mind: chintzy and insensitive. The mother, if not the kid, was kinda dense to ignore your feelings and the fact that the dolls were a labor of love. To nickel and dime a relative is pretty cheap, and I hope she got a lot for the extra 40 bucks she made.

One thing she lost was the good feeling between you, and should she notice the relationship is not what it once was, I would be open with her as to the reason.

                        - MARGO, DISENCHANTEDLY

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"But why don't you scream now?" Alice asked, holding her hands ready to put over her ears again.

"Why, I've done all the screaming already," said the Queen. "What would be the good of having it all over again?"
graciedoo
« Reply #64 on: October 09, 2006 07:52:50 AM »

This year is my first craft-gift Christmas, but I'm only crafting gifts for ten people because I know they're the ones who will truely appreciate handmade things. I would love to make gifts for everyone, but I know many people would never use knitted things. Some wouldn't even care about them.
 
But luckily I have some friends who get very excited every time I make them something. They use thier hats/mittens/whatevers very often. :-]


Everyone else will be getting novelty socks and candy.
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eggnogstic
« Reply #65 on: October 10, 2006 01:00:24 PM »

I personally, have 5 aunts on my moms side.  Add to this a great-aunt, my mom, step-gradmother, (at one time) mother-in-law, and sisters-in-law and that's alot of ladies to make/buy presents for! 

Since I was a kid I've made presents for family and friends.  First it was painted wooden shape magnets (with ribbon embelishment) when I was 12.  Everybody said they like them and hung them on their refrigerators.  Next was Sculpey pendants with runes and other symbols, when I was 15.  Everybody liked them and I saw several people wearing the necklaces around. 

Then, a few years a go I made everyone "Mocha Latte in a Jar" from one of those Gifts-in-a-Jar cookbooks.  What a terrible mistake.  I recently visited an aunt of mine (who isn't particularly picky in what she eats) and found FIVE jars of the stuff in her cupboard!  That means that she got the loot from EVERY OTHER AUNT!  Next year those harpies are getting something from Wal-Mart like a measuring cup set.  Screw spending hours on something that'll be despised! 

Yeah, I'm a little bitter.  I'm working through the pain.   Wink
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I shall not fear.  Fear is the mind-killer.  Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration.
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« Reply #66 on: October 12, 2006 07:55:14 PM »

eggnostic,
if it was only one gift that was redistributed, I'd be careful about jumping to any conclusions.  Clearly, your gifts were appreciated in the past.  Everybody can use a magnet.  The jewelery can be hit and miss... and not everybody shares the same passion for Mocha Latte in a Jar.  Maybe the one aunt who had them all was especially fond of the stuff and so the other aunts gave theirs to her?  On a positive note... they were in a cupboard, not packed awaywith the Christmas decorations or stuffed in the garbage... chin up...
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nellum
« Reply #67 on: October 12, 2006 08:44:58 PM »

I have almost the opposite problem... since I only craft for those that will appreciate it, sometimes my gifts are overappreciated.  My gramma was the first recepient of a crafty gift (two granny square pillows to match her couch) and she shows them off to everyone she knows. My stepmom received a chunky chenille garter stitch scarf last year, mostly because it was cheap, took me an hour to do, and kept my dad from beaking about me not getting her a gift... she spent the entire evening showing it off to everyone in the house.  Guess what she's getting this year? An identical scarf in a different colour.  I might get creative and put a cable up the middle, so I'm not bored to tears.  I think the key is narrowing it down to just the people who care that you made them something, even if it was really basic.     
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talmina
« Reply #68 on: October 13, 2006 02:13:22 AM »

I'm lucky with my group of friends, I rang one of my friends up last year and said "I'm making you a corset, I need to come over and measure you" It was just going to be one from the elizabethan corset generator, but she was over the moon about it, we still haven't finished it cos she wants to come shopping with me to get the fabric, but we have done a mockup.  Another friend is getting a studded pvd tie for his 21st, and everyone who knows is so excited about it cos they can see how much he will love it. 

I do have one or two friends who don't quite understand the work that goes into crafting, both of whom asked for a dr who scarf, one has been told that when he gets the money for the materials I'll make it for him.  The other has also been told that he has to buy the materials, but it has somehow gone from a worsted/heavy worsted weight 9ft garter stitch scarf to a dk weight double knit charted still near 9ft scarf, he has however been told he owes me big for it, however he is a good one to just buy random gifts so I'm not too stressed about it.

The only people in my family I'm concerned about crafting for is my brothers, one of whom I don't speak to, and the other kept claiming that he was gonna go tell one of the guys I was doing a commission for not to do it.

The only truly unappreciated knitted items I've had were something I knit on what I thought was commission for one of the women my boyfriend works with, when she recieved it she said "I really should get her something as a thank you"  and it was horrible yarn she bought for it too, red acrylic that bled on my needles and muppet in a blender eyelash stuff held together.  The poor boy didn't know what to do, he gave me the money out of his pocket and didn't tell me for like a month what really happened.  After that it was no more commissions for people I don't know, but I will teach them to knit if they want to.
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