The Cinco PastaBear!
It’s the perfect gift for Chrimbus!
Here’s what you’ll need:
A stuffed bear (preferably with a seam down the middle of his belly), two cans of cut-rate pasta, a quart-sized zippered plastic baggie, some fabric scraps.
A seam ripper, sewing machine, needle and coordinating thread, pins, construction paper and marker. Also, rudimentary sewing skills, the willingness to cut up a discarded, once-loved plushie, Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job Chrimbus Special http://video.adultswim.com/tim-and-eric-awesome-show-great-job/tim-and-eric-chrimbus-special.html
and a recipient that will appreciate a PastaBear.
Place the baggie onto the fabric scraps and cut out two squares the same size as the baggie, but with a generous seam allowance.
Sew the pouch and pink the edges (so you can treasure your PastaBear for years to come).
Rip open the bear’s belly seam from chin to crotch, making it as long as the top of the pouch.
Remove a handful or two of stuffing to make way for the pasta.
Pin the fabric pouch to the opening in the bear. The pinked edges go in the inside of the bear. It's alright if the pouch doesn't quite fit in, no one will notice if you fudge it a little.
Sew the pouch into the bear's opening using needle and thread. I used a whipstitch.
Some of the hair will get caught under the thread, this is alright, you can use a comb to tease out the hair after you’ve finished sewing.
Open the cans of pasta.
Dump into the baggie.
Insert baggie into the bear’s pasta pouch. If the baggie is too full, take some pasta out and throw away/save for further use.
Make a “Cinco Pasta Bear” label.
Sew to the animal.
Wrap, label the package to your first wife, shove it under the Chrimbus bush and wait for Winter Man to come.
A few notes:
You should probably craft this while watching the Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job Chrimbus Special.
This project went together for less than $4 .
I bought my bear from the local thrift store (though, since it is close to Xmas, the stuffed animal population is going down drastically, and I almost had to make a Cinco Ravioli Rabbit).
Unlike the inspiration, I put the pasta in a plastic bag for a couple reasons. So the dog didn’t blow the surprise by being too interested in the gift, so the package wouldn't reek of spaghetti and meatballs, and so the Cinco Pasta Bear can be reused with Cinco Pasta Inserts for years to come.
Comments and Criticism are welcomed!