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Topic: Very Small Informal Wedding  (Read 2523 times)
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Hotsaucencake
« on: December 15, 2009 02:10:54 PM »

I recently got engaged and we are planning on a small wedding (only about 12 guests). we are both outdoorsy people so we are considering having it outside. Any ideas for locations? (We also are on a very small budget)

We will have a reception or a party, hopefully, at our new house, after we return from our honeymoon with other friends and family. Which presents the problem of family with children and rowdy friends. Is there some way we can have a reception from 1-4 (?) for everyone and let friends know that they can stay later. (There will be beer and anyone drinking can stay)

Because of the small guest list we also need to find a way to announce the wedding to the rest of the family, make sure there is no confusion about what they are and are not invited to, and hurt as few feelings as possible.

Any input would be great! Thanks!

EDIT:
Everyone would be invited to the entire party, but I'd just like to let people know that after a certain time (probably later in the evening) it may not be appropriate for children. (not sure how to word that, but I know some of our friends may get out of hand) And also, I'd like to let friends know that if they have been drinking, they are welcome to stay.
« Last Edit: December 21, 2009 10:30:52 AM by Hotsaucencake » THIS ROCKS   Logged
green_olives
« Reply #1 on: December 15, 2009 05:16:06 PM »

Since your both outdoorsy you could look at parks in your area for the wedding or even have it in a backyard... yours or someone you know.

As for the other dilemmas you could just put on invitations that after 4pm or whatever time you choose is an adult reception and before that it is family friendly and only send invitations to those invited and then after the reception you can send an announcement to everyone else saying that you got married.
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« Reply #2 on: December 17, 2009 12:06:30 PM »

I agree with the previous post regarding how to phrase the invites, etc.  For locations . . . well, what part of the country do you live in?  Are you close to the ocean, a large lake, mountains, forests, meadows?  Pretty much anywhere outside in spring or summer could be a nice wedding location.  Just remember to have a "back up plan" in case of bad weather!
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BoxOfRocks
« Reply #3 on: December 19, 2009 06:57:53 AM »

Ditto on checking out local parks, public gardens, etc.  Be sure to determine if you need permits for your ceremony, photos, etc., and what time period you need to apply for said permits and possible fees.  Please also consider weather, as another poster stated, how many chairs you will need, space, and other venue-type considerations.

Quote
Which presents the problem of family with children and rowdy friends. Is there some way we can have a reception from 1-4 for everyone and let friends know that they can stay later. (There will be beer and anyone drinking can stay)

Just confirming--everyone can attend the entire reception, but for those who want to let their hair down, they can stay past 4 PM?  If so, say in the invitations / reception card that there will be a (cake & champagne, light hors d'oeuvres, or whatever) reception from 1-4 and thereafter, a relaxed party? 

I don't recommend telling people to come to only certain sections of the same party in the same night.  I think that's rude...imagine pulling up into your driveway and finding that you were only supposed attend at a certain time because the hosts thought you were too uncouth to attend earlier.  Or, at the stroke of 4 PM, being told, "Get out of here...now it's time for the real party, you stick in the mud!" 

Regarding invitation wording:  there is standard wording about inviting people to a larger reception but not a small ceremony.  Check out The Knot or etiquette books.  (It's OK to have a smaller ceremony and a larger reception, but not the other way around.)  Likewise, there is wording about for wedding announcements for people who were not invited.  They key is to send them out AFTER the wedding!

Happy planning and best wishes.
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Hotsaucencake
« Reply #4 on: December 21, 2009 10:29:09 AM »

Just confirming--everyone can attend the entire reception, but for those who want to let their hair down, they can stay past 4 PM?  If so, say in the invitations / reception card that there will be a (cake & champagne, light hors d'oeuvres, or whatever) reception from 1-4 and thereafter, a relaxed party? 

I don't recommend telling people to come to only certain sections of the same party in the same night.  I think that's rude...imagine pulling up into your driveway and finding that you were only supposed attend at a certain time because the hosts thought you were too uncouth to attend earlier.  Or, at the stroke of 4 PM, being told, "Get out of here...now it's time for the real party, you stick in the mud!" 

Everyone would be invited to the entire party, but I'd just like to let people know that after a certain time (probably later in the evening) it may not be appropriate for children. (not sure how to word that, but I know some of our friends may get out of hand) And also, I'd like to let friends know that if they have been drinking, they are welcome to stay.
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snips and snails
« Reply #5 on: December 23, 2009 10:53:42 AM »

If it were me:

I would make up my invitations for the 1-4 reception normally.
I would also make up a cool flyer (ya know, like they advertise local bands and stuff), fold it up, and stick it into the invitations of people you are inviting for the "after hours". You can put "R Rated fun - and then list things like...
"For: Suggestive behavior, Consumption of Alcohol" etc.
**Depending on what your flyer looks like... you might be able to give it to everyone. Chances are your elderly uncle won't come to an "after hours party" anyway. But I'm not sure how to keep rowdy friends away without hurt feelings.

And I don't know where you live, but in our city we have a park that has an outside... picnic table room? lol. I rented it for an afternoon from the Park District for $40 and held a baby shower there. It turned out really beautiful and had a wonderful forest-y backdrop. You could use the picnic tables as replacements for chairs/pews.


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Hondagirlracr
« Reply #6 on: December 31, 2009 05:00:28 PM »

My man and I are getting married at the courthouse and having a reception party at our local park. I would give everyone invites to the party at the park. And maybe seperate ones for a party afterwards at your house or maybe the next day.
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dawnofdolls
« Reply #7 on: June 30, 2010 09:35:03 AM »

You can often find very nice free venues to hold your wedding at... my sister had hers at an open-air chapel overlooking the hill country here.  At night with lanterns - it was gorgeous, and free!  Sometimes they'll just ask for a small deposit and you're all set.

My bf and I have discussed a wedding in Hawaii... the initial trip would be pricey, but if you figure in a very small guest list and the fact that our honeymoon would be included - sounds pretty good!  Plus, it's Hawaii.  Can't lose with that one.  haha   Grin
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