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Topic: What do you think?  (Read 1018 times)
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sometonguewithakiss
« on: November 16, 2008 09:43:58 PM »

My fiance and I are getting married Sept. 4, 2009 on the family farm. The ceremony is going to take place in my parent's yard along the right side of the house next to the vegetable garden. Since there's already plenty of flowers and greenery I don't plan on decorating much. I'd like to keep the ceremony as simple as possible, with only one bride's maid/maid of honor and one groom's man/man of honor. I would like to have my sister as my maid of honor but there's a possibility she won't be there.

The school she goes to says "it'll be difficult for her to catch up if she misses any school early in the year." It's a nontraditional unaccredited school which has classes Mon-Sat and Chapel on Sun. They also don't celebrate Labor Day so she won't have a 3-day weekend like the rest of the guests. My parents (who are paying for the wedding) are really pushing for me to move the date up a month just for my sister, but I don't think it's fair to the other out-of-state guests, which includes myself, my fiance, his ENTIRE family, my dad's side of the family, and 6 of the 8 guests who aren't family. I'm also very fond of the date 9/4/09. Am I wrong to be so unwilling to change the date?

As for the reception/backyard hootenanny, I want it to be a very casual occasion with plenty of food and drink, music, fire, and stuff to do. Neither my fiance or I are big on dancing so I don't plan on dancing, but instead having games and stuff. I'm not too thrilled about having toasts either, my experience is that they never go well, but I'm not sure how to handle that.

I would like to have the reception directly behind the house around the fire pit with a sort of harvest theme. Around that time the family should be harvesting blackberries, raspberries, strawberries, squash, the first of the apples and possibly some corn. I'm thinking lots of pies/cobblers, salad, and beef since it's primarily a cattle farm. Hopefully we'll also be able to serve seafood since my fiance and I are avid fishers who LOVE seafood. Since it's going to be a dinner I'd like to set up picnic tables around the fire pit, but I don't want assigned seating. I want people to mingle and enjoy themselves.I hate the typical harvest colors so I drew inspiration from the food. I'd like my colors to be raspberry red, dark purple, apple green, and a golden yellow (like hay or corn). I'm just not entirely sure how that will look and I'm not really sure how to tie the colors into the ceremony, besides my bouquet.

I'm also a bit anxious because I'm half way across the country and am planning on doing the majority of things myself or with the help of family in Washington. I'm already planning on heading over there a month early so I can spend that month before the wedding preparing everything, but I'm not sure that will be enough time. There's so much to do and I have so much time between now and then. I'd like to get as many things done now as possible, but I feel like there's not much I can do over here besides what I've finished already (STD, invites, envelopes, thank yous). The only thing I haven't finished is my dress, which I still haven't picked out yet.

I don't know if I'm getting too far ahead of myself since I have a while to figure things out, but any suggestions and/or opinions would be great. Sorry for the long post.
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Jane2
« Reply #1 on: November 16, 2008 10:21:49 PM »

I do not  have much to suggest - but what if it rains on your big day?

 I am sure it is possible to rent a huge tent for the day.  I have seen them at wedding receptions, but someone else will have to tell you from where it is possible to rent one. (Think "circus tent" size.)
And even if it doesn't rain, a large tent would be a shelter from the sun, heat, wind etc.

All the best,
Janey (Jane2 on craftster)
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sometonguewithakiss
« Reply #2 on: November 17, 2008 08:19:06 AM »

If it rains we'll move the ceremony to one of the barns and the reception into the house. We've got a huge house with a covered wrap around porch that's plenty big enough. I'm not worried about heat or wind because it rarely gets too hot at our altitude that time of year and the property is surrounded by trees so we don't get much wind. The trees also provide plenty of shade later in the day, as do the giant sunflowers we plant along the edge of the vegetable garden.
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Elensule
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« Reply #3 on: November 19, 2008 09:05:58 PM »

Hi!

I think... I don't think you're being unreasonable, because the date seems feasible for MOST of the out of state guests, from what you're saying, and you ought to be able to look at the big picture. While it would be sad for you for your sister not to be able to come, the rest of your family needs to be considered as well.

As to how to tie in colors... There are lots of ways! Centerpieces on the table (maybe yummy fruit/veggie dips or something, in the middle of the tables?), the color of your husbands boutonierre, the cake, even things like invitations, save the dates and guest souvenirs (if you were planning on those.

That's all I have, but it sounds like your wedding is going to be LOVELY. Smiley Best of luck!
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the1irishgirl
« Reply #4 on: November 21, 2008 08:07:14 AM »

From what you said, the school indicated that it would be difficult but not IMPOSSIBLE to make up the time/work?  Right?  So maybe your sister will have to work twice as hard in school for a little while to catch up? 
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*MAR*
« Reply #5 on: November 21, 2008 09:47:28 AM »

If you sister absolutely cannot make it (wow! what a strict school schedule!), and it would ruin the day for you for her NOT to be there, then I would consider another date. If you feel that you are putting out too many people by changing the date, or you have your heart set on the date, then I would go with the date you have. Ultimately, you have to consider your feelings the most, because those are the feelings that will linger. And if she can't come - just make sure you have some great video of the day and have a "wedding" party the next time you two are together. Maybe include something of hers, a bracelet, a pendant, or something to symbolize her. When you can watch the vid, look over the album, make a fun cake. She'll feel included then, even if she couldn't be there. And you still get to share everything with her.

Good luck. Planning from so far away is hard. I feel for ya!

(and CONGRATULATIONS on the upcoming wedding, it sounds like it will be beautiful!)
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