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Topic: I want to take it to the next level with the boyfriend - any ideas?  (Read 1773 times)
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instantkarma
« on: February 25, 2008 02:48:20 PM »

So, it'll be my boyfriend and my's two-year anniversary in May. It feels like it's been a lot longer than that, though - we've survived introducing each other to our friends and family, enduring multiple parental groundings, changing to new jobs (mine) and sticking with old jobs (his), dealing with my psychopathic foster parents, unstable younger brother and his unstable aunt, going to each others' graduations, moving me into his house (bless his parents for that one), road-tripping off to meet his extended family, working out finances for college, sending me off to college and sending his admission letter for college in, and so many other things.

We've become very close to each other, to the point that his parents are basically expecting (no - kind of DEPENDING on) us to get married at some point, preferably after college for the two of us...and, even though it really hasn't been super long, I like the idea.

We're both nerdy, both love anime and video games, both are roughly the same height, weight and look somewhat alike, both have glasses, both speak some German, both love pretty much the same types of music, both love to eat (haha), hang out with our friends and just be together. I love that.

So, can anyone think of a gift that I could give him that would say something along the lines of that I really like the idea of marrying him and want our relationship to continue on with the idea of marriage in mind? I guess it would kind of be like a promise ring-type of thing, only not a ring (he doesn't wear jewelry at all).

I thought about this last night as I was going to sleep, and couldn't come up with any ideas. Can you guys help me out?
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« Reply #1 on: February 25, 2008 05:32:34 PM »

hmmm....maybe you could make him a scrapbook of the two of you together?

What are your favorite anime series? We watch a bunch of anime, too...maybe something anime themed.
Maybe make him some fansubs of some new ones?

I'm kinda traditional, so I'd probably say don't come on tooooo strong. As long as you two have talked about your futures together, and you are both on the same page, it will happen  Wink
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instantkarma
« Reply #2 on: February 25, 2008 05:35:16 PM »

I could take up a large part of this forum by listing my favorite anime. Wink
I was thinking of downloading him a few series (serieses? serii?) and giving them to him for our anniversary, but I'm not sure about that...

Thanks for the words about being on the same page - I definitely agree, but at the same time I'm into symbolism (and crafting!) and really wanted to get him something to symbolize my thoughts.
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BoxOfRocks
« Reply #3 on: February 27, 2008 07:11:47 PM »

So, can anyone think of a gift that I could give him that would say something along the lines of that I really like the idea of marrying him and want our relationship to continue on with the idea of marriage in mind? I guess it would kind of be like a promise ring-type of thing, only not a ring (he doesn't wear jewelry at all).



Thanks for the words about being on the same page - I definitely agree, but at the same time I'm into symbolism (and crafting!) and really wanted to get him something to symbolize my thoughts.

OP, from your posts, it is not clear that you have spoken seriously and candidly with your boyfriend about getting married and all related issues (children, careers, where you will live, etc.).  Given that and your ages (I'm guessing you're quite young due to the milestones you cited), I suggest talking before any giving any gift.

Quote
his parents are basically expecting (no - kind of DEPENDING on) us to get married at some point

Huh?

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instantkarma
« Reply #4 on: February 27, 2008 07:27:07 PM »

Well, we've talked about pretty much all of that (children, careers, housing, finances, etc.) already and very candidly, and we both agree that we're on the same page...so I guess we're a little bit more mature than some couples our age.

The part about his parents "depending" on us getting married was kind of a joke - they just think that we're pretty much perfect for each other and would probably be a little disappointed if we didn't get married (they signed my Christmas card as "your future in-laws") . I guess you'd have to know them and us to get what I mean.

I appreciate your concern, but we've seen all types of marriages fall apart around us and we don't plan on getting married until we're both seriously ready (both individually and as a couple). Smiley

Anyway, I didn't come in here for relationship advice, I came in looking for a clever way to say what I want to say...it's a toughie; maybe I'll have to go sit in the corner and dwell on it some more.
« Last Edit: February 27, 2008 07:27:46 PM by instantkarma » THIS ROCKS   Logged

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dyingsockgirl
« Reply #5 on: March 04, 2008 03:04:59 PM »

What type of things does he wear or carry with him always?
When he has some spare cash what does he usually buy?

Try to think of something he REALLY likes and maybe... make a quirky version of it or something Smiley.

and may I recommend baking some promise apple strudel to serve with whatever you make  Wink
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If you really want to hurt your parents and
you dont have nerve enough to be homosexual,
the least you can do is go into the arts.
Kurt Vonnegut, Jr
instantkarma
« Reply #6 on: March 05, 2008 03:41:28 PM »

Sounds like a good idea. Wink I had a few ideas last night (in the shower...does anyone else always have their revelations in the shower?) so I shall work on them. Thanks!
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marlie2
« Reply #7 on: March 08, 2008 08:15:43 AM »

does anyone else always have their revelations in the shower?)

YES.

(they signed my Christmas card as "your future in-laws")

And also, AWW.

A promise ring minus the jewelry... I see that you can sew, do you quilt at all? A photo quilt of the two of you would be really sweet. It seems like the type of thing that includes all of the labor of love, plus the celebration of your past that suggests a commitment for what's to come.


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instantkarma
« Reply #8 on: March 10, 2008 11:37:42 AM »

I don't quilt, but I've always wanted to learn! Cheesy
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direadieu
« Reply #9 on: March 11, 2008 03:30:22 PM »

Wow!! This is a really difficult one! I was trying to think what I would do if I was in your situation..but it's hard. If it was me I would probably take the very boring option of writing some kind of letter saying that I like the idea of marriage etc...but I dont know, thats not particularly nice. Maybe you could make something that would be useful for once you get married?  Huh I dont really know what that could be though lol. The good thing is that it would be saying "Here's something to use WHEN and IF we get married" so it's not going to scare him or anything.

I hope you think of something though and maybe I helped a bit..though I doubt it  Cheesy Good luck!
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