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21  Archive of Past Craftster Challenge Entries / CHALLENGE 36 ENTRIES / Standing on the Rooftops, Everybody Scream Your HEART OUT!! lostprophets on: March 04, 2009 12:16:01 PM
This is my first challenge entry!  I was really nervous about doing this because I've seen the challenge entries every month and I was afraid mine wouldn't measure up.  But then I just thought, "f*ck it", and entered anyway.  If nothing else, this was a cathartic process!  This is kind of a long rambling story, so be forewarned:)  For about the last 5 years, since the birth of my middle child, I've been pretty overweight.  I've felt as if I've been living in a prison of my own making sometimes.  I think my husband is the only person on earth who has any inkling of how deeply unhappy I'd been.  I steer clear of mirrors because, in my mind's eye, I still see myself like I was and catching a glimpse of what I am is a shock to the system...even after 5 years.  I've been mired in a mix of self-loathing and self-sabotage.  This led to a horrible cycle of being desperate to lose the weight, but being afraid to try, for fear of failure, and subsequently deciding not to do anything about it.  Last year, in July, I finally made my move and started actively trying to lose weight.  So, 7 months later, I'm a third of the way to my goal weight.  I've lost just under 30 pounds and have 51 pounds left to lose.  That may sound super awesome and reason to celebrate, but I'll be honest.  It's a constant battle.  I struggle daily to remind myself why I'm doing this.  My reasons include:

1) my health
2) my kids
3 ) my husband
4 ) making my appearance pleasing to myself

I've fallen off the wagon a couple times, but I get back on and I forge ahead.  Some days, though...  Some days I want to give up altogether and just go back to being the way I was because, although I was miserable, it was easier.  Lately I've been struggling a lot, mentally.  I've just had several weeks of feeling like, even though I'm trying so hard, I'm just going to be fat forever and I'll never be happy with myself.  I'm starting to shake it off, but I don't expect that this will be the last time I feel like that.  I've had to recognize that it will continue to be a battle.  For the rest of my life.  Shit, sometimes it's less a battle and more an all-out war.

All that being said, this song speaks to me on this particular issue for a lot of reasons.  Here are some of the lyrics:

When our time is up,
When our lives are done,
Will we say we've had our fun?

Will we make our mark
this time?
Will we always say we tried?

Standing on the rooftops,
Everybody scream your heart out.
Standing on the rooftops,
Everybody scream your heart out.
Standing on the rooftops,
Everybody scream your heart out.
This is all we've got now,
Everybody scream your heart out.

Standing on the rooftop,
(Waiting till the bomb drops)
This is all we've got now,
(Scream until your heart stops)
Never gonna regret,
(Watching every sunset)
Listen to your heartbeat,
(All the love that we've felt)


Here's a link to the song too:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EMZDvOLh8Zg

Here's my interpretation:



Close up of the words:



See, it makes me realize something.  I just HAVE to keep doing this.  Because, all the reasons I listed above aside, one thing makes me know that.  I can't believe how much of the last 5 years I've wasted hating the way I look, the way I feel.   How many outings I've skipped with my kids because I won't get in a bathing suit or didn't want to meet their friends' parents because I was afraid of what they'd think of me.  How many pictures I haven't taken with my family because I couldn't bear to see reality staring me in the face.  How many hugs I avoided from my husband so he won't feel my fat when his arms go around me.  How many endless days I've spent drowning in regret over a million things...over this one thing.  I heard somewhere that the pain of discipline is inconsequential compared to the pain of regret.  I have to make myself be mindful of that every minute of every day.  I don't want to wait till the bomb drops.

This song made me think of all that.  And I know that my painting is a very literal interpretation of the song, but it's meant to be.  I do feel like just going on the roof and screaming sometimes.  Out of frustration, pain, misery, anger, celebration, joy, etc.  Any of those and all of those.  Don't we all feel that way sometimes?

So I took a picture of myself striking the pose you see in the painting.  And, wow, did I feel I like an idiot doing that:)  Anyway, then I did some Photoshop stuff to isolate myself from the background and filled in my silhouette with black.  I used that image on a rooftop with a city skyline as a stencil.  I actually painted this on the back of an old t-shirt!  We're broke as a joke in this joint lately so I couldn't buy a canvas.  I just ironed some interfacing to the shirt, taped it around one of those wood painting things you can get from Hobby Lobby, and painted like it was a regular canvas.  I've never really painted anything before, except for stenciling stuff.  I stenciled the skyline and my silhouette on there, but I freehanded the sky and stars.  It was done with acrylic paints mixed with fabric medium.  I then mounted it on the wood painting that I stretched it around and sprayed it with a sealer and voila!  I was really suprised at how stiff it became.

So, that's my entry.  And that's me.  Here's hoping that I win this battle and maybe this time next year, my silhouette will look a lot different.  Kudos if you made it all the way through this!
22  HOME SWEET HOME / Interior Decorating: Completed Projects / Re: My awesome Wall Letters on: February 28, 2009 11:01:06 PM
Wow, those look so great!!!  I'm glad my tute was helpful Grin  I really like how your papers aren't typical girl colors, but still look feminine.  I love the paper that's on the E the most!  And Zoe is such a great name! 
23  MORE ART, LESS CRAFT / More Art, Less Craft: Completed Works / Re: Longtime Lurker, First time Poster! Wacom tablet drawing. IMG HVY. on: February 26, 2009 08:57:44 AM
That is completely gorgeous!  Her hair is so lifelike!  It looks so soft and luminous, like I could just reach out and touch it and it'd feel real.
24  PURSES, BAGS, WALLETS / Purses, Bags, Wallets: Completed Projects: General / Needle Roll for Pheebs on: February 25, 2009 10:59:01 AM
So, I made this for my sister!  We both knit, as does our mom.  I made my mom a needle roll 2 Christmases ago and have planned to make one for my sister ever since, but just never got around to it.  Anyway, I used this tutorial that my friend made for me.  See, my friend originally made me a needle roll and I wanted to make one for my mom but I suck at figuring out how to sew things on my own so she made me a little tutorial.  Which I subsequently posted on the post for the needle roll I made my mom and that's here in case anyone else wants to make a needle roll.  I posted the other one on the knitting board but it makes more sense to post it here, I think.  After all, needles rolls fit into the "stuff to carry other stuff" category.  Ok, enough rambling.  Here's the inside with some of my knitting/crochet stuff in the pockets:



A little closer up:



And here's the little label I made.  My sister's name is Phoebe and I frequently call her Pheebs.  I just wrote out Pheebs on some freezer paper and made a little stencil out of that and then used it as a guide to hand embroider on the same ribbon I used for the needle roll.  Oh, I fused some interfacing to the ribbon first.  And then, like a douchebag, I forgot to sew the label down before I put the whole shebang together so I had to hand sew that on and be mindful of going through only the top layer of fabric Roll Eyes.



Here's the flap folded down so you can see a bit of the outer fabric:



And, finally, here it is all rolled up and tied:



I hope she likes it!  My husband picked out the fabrics and I think he did an excellent job Grin



25  NEEDLEWORK / Needlework: Completed Projects / Re: Adam Sessler (G4TV) quote on: February 25, 2009 09:49:47 AM

And whole freakin cow. I got an email from Mr. Sessler's assistant and an address to send the completed project!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm asking for a picture of him with it, but if not, who cares. It's just cool that he is interested.

Damn, now I gotta frame it.   Tongue

Ha!  That's so cool!  Gotta love famous people that appreciate fans AND creativity!  I love the quote too:D
26  CLOTHING / Clothing: Completed Projects: Reconstructed / Re: Prom Dress- Remade from Ugly Corset on: February 25, 2009 09:45:15 AM
Wow, that dress is so great!!  I love all the random bits and pieces and the color is awesome too!  I can only make out two of the words ('out' and 'her').  What do the others say?  I wish that when I was in high school I had known boys as daring and willing to be different as your date seems to be.  His jacket is rad!  And I love that he paired it with a bright red tuxedo shirt.  Who cares what those other kids said?!  Speaking for myself, most of the kids I knew in high school were a**holes and were too busy following the pack to know what was really cool.
27  CROCHET / Amigurumi: Completed Projects / Re: $pend and $ave on: February 25, 2009 05:06:58 AM
Holy crap, that is way too cute!  And your comic strip was freaking funny too:D  If my husband were reading it, he'd say "that's what she said".
28  NEEDLEWORK / Needlework: Completed Projects / Re: My first embroidery project on: February 23, 2009 06:17:56 PM
For some reason that phrase never ceases to amuse me even though it can get a little over played. I still laugh every time.

I have to agree that it doesn't get old.  My husband was over at a friend's house recently and I texted him and said something about having just put on some rosacea lotion and that it was really irritating my skin.  It started really burning after a few minutes and I texted him to say "AAAHHHHHH!!!  It burns!!!!  It burns!!!!" and he texted back "that's what she said".  I was cracking up.  I showed him this and we both laughed!!! 
29  CLOTHING / Clothing for Kids: Completed Projects / Re: My name is Dorian!!! I like to DANCE!!! on: February 23, 2009 09:33:25 AM
I don't have any kids yet (one inside, though!), so I have never heard of this show. But it sounds really cute! These shirts are so amazing. Your LO is lucky to have you! I bet he's the coolest dressed kid around. My favorite is the robot-looking guy...Toodee?

The robot one is Plex.  He's not just any robot either.  He's a MAGIC robot, heehee.  Toodee is the blue/light blue cat/dragon thingie on the orange shirt.

Anyway, I highly recommend this shirt for your future kiddo.  In my opinion, it's the best kid's show since Pee-Wee's Playhouse.  I mean, seriously, they have a segment called Biz's Beat of the Day where Biz Markie teaches the kids beatboxing techniques.  Awesome!  And they have really cool bands on, not to mention all the good lessons they teach (good manners, how to be careful, hygiene, etc).  I can't say enough good things about this show!  My husband makes fun of me and says I'd watch it even if Dorian didn't. Cheesy
30  CLOTHING / Clothing for Kids: Completed Projects / Epic "L" Shirt (Death Note) on: February 23, 2009 09:24:40 AM
This is a mix of a few different crafts, but it's appliqued so this seemed an appropriate board.  I'm always crafting up something, whether it's something knitted, stenciled, appliqued, etc.  But, I guess I sometimes get carried away making stuff for other people and neglect to make things for my own kiddies.  I just recently finished making a bunch of Yo Gabba Gabba shirts for my 2 yr old as a birthday present and while I was working on them, my 5 yr old, Sebastian, came up to me and said "Mom, how come you never make me anything?  Like any shirts or anything?".  Needless to say, that was a knife to the heart of a crafting mom.  And a situation that had to be remedied with a quickness.  So, my husband, Sebastian, and I are big Death Note fans.  And of course L is our favorite character.  Here's what I came up with! 







First, I found a good image of L.  It came from one of the posters from Death Note.  Then, since he pretty much blended into the background, I had to do all kinds of Photoshop business to separate him from the background so I could trace him.  I traced most of him onto an old shirt of Sebastian's (after ironing some interfacing to the wrong side of the shirt) that happened to be the perfect color for L's skin, and then painted him with acrylic mixed with textile medium.  I freehanded most of the line detail in his shirt, pants, and face with pencil and then went over that with black.  After that, I cut him out, leaving a smallish border, which I painted a dark red so that L's hair wouldn't blend into the black shirt I was planning on sewing him to.  I fused L to some Heat n' Bond, ironed him to the shirt I wanted to use and then sewed him down.

Next, I traced, cut, fused, and appliqued the "L" logo to the back of the shirt.  To those that don't follow Death Note, the L is what comes on the TV when L is doing a broadcast because no one knows who he really is at first.

And, in case you're wondering, I called this an "epic L shirt" because it took me a freaking long time to paint L and get all the details of him right.  I think I did a pretty good job of capturing him!

Here he is while I was painting him:



And here he is after I finished painting, but before I cut him out and painted the red border.



So, that's that!  Sebastian loved it!  And I don't feel guilty anymore Grin
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