I don't know much, cause nothing like this ever came while I was living in Japan, but I do know that silver is the appropriate colour here. There is a certain type of knot that is used for different ocasions. You could try to google it. I just know about the silver because when I was taking lesson on how to put on my kimono all by myself I was told that I was never to show the silver side of my fan, because that was for funerals and times of mourning only. Sorry I wasn't much help, but I thought I would pass on at least what I do know.