I'm working on the nursery for our first and I know exactly how you feel! I was pretty quick to pick out a color scheme after we found out we were expecting since I knew I wanted to keep it pretty gender neutral. I HATE all the bright primary baby color stuff because it just clashes so much with our tastes and am not a fan of the whole blue/boy pink/girl thing. So we decided on a brown/khaki/green color scheme and everything fell in place from there.
The one thing that I can suggest is to start looking around for that 'one thing' that you just have to have in the baby's room, whether its a bedding that you fall in love with, a piece of artwork, ect and build off of that. For me, the first thing I ever bought for the baby was a quilt kit from Joann's thats chocolate brown and sage green and the main fabric print is Michael Miller's kids toile. It's got a vintage feel but not too baby. I loved that one fabric so much that I searched all over the internet until I found somewhere I could order it and picked up several more yards to incorporate into curtains and cushions for the rocker and even some small artwork pieces. It's basically become the 'theme' for the room without being too screamingly obvious.
I have a friend who just finished setting up her daughter's 'new' nursery (they just moved her to another room in the house) and she went with a shabby chic type feel with bright coral, black, and white. She went and got some pictures of her daughter blown up in black and white and framed that as the main center piece on the walls and all the accessories are black, white, or coral. She was inspired because of a chandelier that she found that she is determined to eventually be able to buy for the room.
As far as sites for inspiration, I second ohdeedoh.com. You can also check out the galleries on http://projectnursery.com/
. They also have a category for nurseries on the HGTV Rate My Space site http://www.roomzaar.com/rate-my-space/Nurseries/gallery.esi
. Of course all of these sites are going to have some 'cutesy' nurseries as well but I've noticed that a lot of people are tending towards more clean line 'mature' feeling baby rooms recently so you should definitely be able to find some inspiration somewhere in there.
Hope that helps!!!